Well done, you!

Managing to sit through that Friday afternoon 54-slide PowerPoint presentation, when Greg from middle management says, “Can you go three slides back” at slide 48, deserves to be rewarded. You kept your blood pressure from reaching dangerous levels in a boardroom with a faulty aircon. You have every right to take your seat at the new eatery for your work’s end-of-year function.

Check yourself at the entrance, though. Do you have a look that screams, “Where’s the alcohol?” Deep, cleansing breaths my brother, and take note of these helpful tips.

Maintain the decorum of the venue. Being polite to the waiting staff will stand you in good stead: you’ll get served first and receive the best portions!

Get off your phone. Talk to someone you hardly ever speak to at work. Imagine the surprise of finding another paddle boarder or a Coen brothers’ fan.

If there’s karaoke or dancing involved, show them that Beyonce has competition and that the IT department has a tap-dancing maestro.

What you want to do is exit at the height of proceedings and not once it dips. Disappearing is not a superpower, rather, it’s a class act. Whether you choose to say goodbye to everyone or just do ‘a ninja’ and disappear, it’s always helpful to have a wingman or -woman.

The rules of year-end functions are actually quite simple, but oh so effective:

  1. Show up
  2. Have fun
  3. Meet new people
  4. Leave

And Boss, here’s some wonderful advice: don’t use the year-end function as a team-building exercise! Let the folks enjoy their meal, kick back and have a whale of a time. Oh, and try and arrange it for during office hours. You want that BOSS OF THE YEAR mug, don’t you? As for the cherry on top: leave a little ‘something that folds’ underneath each of your employees’ placemats.